Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Genetics of Corruption

I am a medical man, and the questions "Why?" and "What else?" are never too many for me. And that helps me to analyze everything by comparing it to something related to our biology.

Being a medical student, I study that almost all diseases can be pinned on genetics. Even infectious diseases (like TB) have a distribution according to genetic predisposition controlled by certain genes. One day, gene therapy might help us make health virtually infallible (not immortal, you cannot fight death).

But there's one disease that is prevalent in every walk of life and might not be curable. Corruption is everywhere. If the media finds loose ends in the corruption by our politicians, it doesn't mean they get the urge once they take office. It's naturally in almost every person in the world, some just fear the Law and yet fewer, fear God.

The first "patient" of corruption I came across was in fact a "friend". I put that in inverted commas because actually I'm a loner in my college, which is apparently a social experiment of bozos from every corner of the country (and outside too but more on that later). You see, there's a Sports Week in every medical college that lasts for about a month (no, they call it the Sports Week the whole month with no hesitation). While the athletes play, the nerds take offices of different societies and sports. This guy was part of the Volleyball Club and had gotten some money to buy ribbons to decorate the poles. He asked me to accompany him and so I did. To my surprise, he looked very excited about the task and kept smiling all the way.
At the shop, he bought the ribbons and two packets of chips. Moreover, he asked the shopkeeper to make a cash memo of an amount larger than the prices of the ribbons. I was shocked. I told him I won't let him do it, while he had his hand stretched out with my chips. In his defense, he said the Club President had told him to do whatever he wanted with the money as long as he brought a cash memo of the given amount. I was dumbfounded. I refused to take the chips and walked away as he stood displeased over my rude refusal to take the packet.
It has been about a year since that day and I'm still disgusted the same when I think about it. This goes on in every society, in every public institution, every year. Face it, we have no right to criticize our politicians.

Another hallmark of medical colleges is bribing lab attendants to help you in the practical examinations. It is such a normal thing that whenever one expressed his unwillingness, he's everybody's laughing stock. That's where "doctors" come from. Once a guy was begging even after paying up, the attendant said, "Sahab! Fikar na karo, kabhi Haraam nahi khaya!" (Sir! Don't worry, I never earn black money).

But again, I'm not blaming doctors or lab attendants- but our nature. I know that teachers in private medical colleges leak university papers to their students so they get distinctions and help them boost their business. Yes, teachers- the so-called builders of tomorrow! Every year, students from private medical colleges (who weren't able to get admissions to government medical colleges because of low marks/ grades) get top positions and get the undue admiration. In practicals, they dictate answers to them before they even enter the laboratory. So if a student in a public medical college bribes an attendant to help him get a few marks, his crime is grossly eclipsed by the teachers' who dictate answers to all questions prior to the examinations.

If there's something that lifted the spirits of the nation, it's cricket. We haven't had any at home in two years but we still love to explore new horizons of curses when we see Afridi get caught on TV. Just as our team appeared to have regained its lost glory in the form of Asif and Aamer (rated the best opening pair by Ian Chappell), corruption made a comeback as well. No doubt it was a set-up, but our players were also bent upon following the leaders of the nation. It's pathetic how they keep preaching their innocence while the news channels have run every video evidence, even the one in which the money is taken.
Earlier Wasim Akram had praised Aamer upon his success saying, "Aamer is more clever than me when I was 18 years". Too bad Aamer proved he was clever by not just bowling like him at that age, but also earning like he did.

Reluctantly, I'd like to say a couple of things about corruption in politics.
Firstly, I'd like to appreciate the fact that some politicians admit they are corrupt.

This tells us that the evil of corruption is beyond repair or reversal. This shows that we have no values as a nation. If there is corruption even in Hajj Schemes, trust me, there is no hope.
Secondly, I'd like to compare another shenanigan that goes on in our Provincial Assemblies with ourselves. While all students are aware of the proxy attendance, the same goes on in the assemblies. Today, Rana Sanaullah pointed out in the Punjab Assembly that the attendance register had marked 35 members as present while only 11 were actually there. I love Pakistan.


  1. This reminds me of Dr Nausheen...correct urself, and u may eventually correct the society.

    abt proxies and cheating...whats really irritating is that such acts are actually seen as heroic by the majority of the population...and don't forget the cheating that goes in even in the written professional exams..its nothing short of scandalous.

  2. Well, I'm only responsible for what I do and what I preach. So I'm kind of apathetic regarding the society now.
    And as for cheating, we all use the rationalization defense mechanism. So well, I don't know... lol.